i miss you so much

"I never asked for this feeling."

Sometimes is she laid very still after waking up and kept her eyes closed, she could still feel him sleeping beside her. Trevor. His slow rhythmic breathing. His arm draped lightly and protectively around her waist.

But these were just memories of moments few and far between. Layla always struggled to hold on to that feeling in the morning and inevitably surrendered to reality after a few seconds. The reality that Trevor was four hours away, that they slept alone every night and could meet in their dreams.

Layla had never wanted this. Anyone who knew her well knew that she was adamantly opposed to long distance relationships. How can you get to know someone over the phone? How can you maintain an intimate connection from just a few visits each year? The long distance relationship just seemed illogical to her.

That was until Trevor. They met while he was in town visiting some old college friends. They hit it off immediately. And as hard as Layla tried to dismiss him and their connection, she eventually succumbed. The two had a great relationship. They had trust and honesty. They were best friends. The chemistry was there.

But sometimes Layla felt so overwhelmed by missing him. It was such a lonely and desperate feeling. Sometimes she worried that she had been right all along. That distance equaled failure, that somehow she would fail him.