one of us

"What would you ask if you had just one question?"

Death.

So far it wasn't anything like Nathan thought it would be. He thought it would be more like the grave, dark, dank, and generally terrifying. He had never really believed the stories of bright lights, but Nathan remembered laying there, covered in his own blood and fighting for breath, he hoped there would be a bright light. Now he was dead, the fight was over, and there was absolutely no bright light.

But things weren't so dark and dank. It was a lot more like Earth than he could have imagined. Being here was discombobulating at first. He had no body but could still see and hear. Movement still felt like walking even though he had no legs. Nathan got over it quickly as he watched the other souls moving about. Somehow as easy to see the differences in as the human face, despite the fact they were all wisps of air surrounding a spark of light.

Then the air changed. At first it seemed like a storm, then Nathan realized that storms in the afterlife seemed unnecessary. And the wind was flowing directly towards and around him. The other souls simply moved around the storm. Nathan thought he caught a glimpse of something in the wind and tried to focus in on it. Suddenly he could see it. Sets of wings, moving so rapidly that he honestly wasn't sure how he was able to see it. Maybe super senses happened in the afterlife. Nathan was awed as it hit him what was happening. Wings in the afterlife could only be one thing, right? Angels.

The wings ushered him towards a remote landscape. A section of this place where souls became sparse. The ones that were here seemed different in a very visible way. If Nathan and the other souls had still been alive, they would be human. But these souls were something else, something more than the humans Nathan was familiar with. Even their souls were different looking. Larger accumulations of the wispy air and the spark inside each was definitely brighter. The wings finally stopped beating frantically. They were still and Nathan marveled at how magnificent there were.

Gigantic sets of wings, towering to at least eight feet, all so pale they were nearly translucent. Yet, just like the souls, they were the same but distinct. Some seemed stronger, some seemed nicer, some just were more radiant. Nathan was staring at them with open awe. Then the light finally came. He was still staring at the wings when he felt it. His back was to it and he wasn't sure how he knew it was light. It wasn't warm like a wash of sunlight. It was more like a magnet, drawing him away from the wonder of the majestic wings, turning him around, and pulling him towards it.

The light was bright, consuming, but not blinding. It was beautiful, more amazing than the wings. Somewhere in the back of his thoughts, Nathan registered two sets of wings flagging the light as well as a trail of air like low fog at his feet. He really could care less about the angels or the fog, he just wanted to be closer to that light. As the light neared, he saw a secondary smaller but more brilliant light directly behind the one drawing him in. The second light was so much smaller and not nearly as magnetic, but glorious enough to temporarily draw his eye. Only a second, then Nathan refocused on the magnetic light.

Nathan made it to the light, and just knelt in front of it. It seemed like the right thing to do, an instinctual act. He knelt and he waited. And felt dumb as the reality of what was happening dawned on him. This was Him. The one and only, the Creator in front of him. Watching him and waiting for him to understand. Nathan wasn't even surprised when a sudden understanding of what was happening emerged in his thoughts, as clearly as if someone had spoken to him. But of course no one had. This was the first day of the afterlife and every returned soul got an audience with their Maker. Got to come to him with one question which would be answered truthfully.

It was a lot. An understatement of course, but Nathan was overwhelmed. The secrets of creation and the universe lay before him. The chicken or the egg. The meaning of life. The existence of aliens. The big bang. All things that zoomed through his head. But Nathan kept coming back to the same thought, the secret turmoil that plagued him throughout his life. He had never spoken it, never even admitted it to himself. But it was there. So he asked it, the only real question, the only one that mattered. He knew he should have already known and internalized the answer, was a bit ashamed to ask but he had take advantage of this one chance. Nathan gazed up into the light and let the question fully form in his mind, sure that the Creator could hear it.

Do you love me?

i'm your angel

"No rivers too wide for you to make it across. All you have to do is believe it when you pray."

I imagine he stood there for a moment. Not a moment of hesitation or disbelief. But a moment of awe at what faith can reap. He was secure in his belief that he and his people had been carried out of Egypt by God, and he knew that if they believed, God would set them free. Yet still, he had to have stood there in amazement to see the fruits of faith. I believe he stopped for just a few moments as the sea parted and felt his heart soar. And I believe the people behind were more taken aback to see this man's immense faith deepen.

It is one thing to believe that a miracle can occur, and a whole other to watch it happen right in front of your eyes. Its what we all look for; some proof of God as glorious at the parting of the Red Sea. But miracles don't come in that size any longer. They manifest in the smallest moments. Non news-worthy reports.

People with faith still are the bearers of miracles. The people with the faith that life is worthy of fighting for with every breath and sinew. The people with faith in the goodness and decency of mankind. The people with the faith that their life is no better than any other man's life. The people with the faith to face their biggest fears.

So Moses got to see the Red Sea part. He walked between two walls of water. He saw what faith can do. And he told us about so that we would always remember too. Miracles happen all around us. Just maybe we're so busy looking for a sea to part that we can't see and appreciate the miracles we receive everyday.

hold me now

"You're not like man. You understand me."

Its good that He knows. It comforts me. Like we have a special secret, and the secret is me. My personal best friend. He knows my first word and remembers my first breath. He loves me with my faults. He listens and gives silent advice. He stands by me when I stand alone. He teaches me morality in an unethical world. He is the shoulder I cry on. And he will hold my hand when I die.

i'm yours

"And it's our God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love loved."

We were created to be loved. We are made from love and saved by love. Its an uncontrollable part of humanity. We fall in love with people, pets, cars, clothes, food, etc. And we yearn for love. We were born to be doted on, listened to, worried about, and embraced. We have arms to hug with, lips to kiss with. Time adapts us to fit into each other. Never be afraid to stand out and asked to be loved. Its what we're meant to do.